13 signs you are a victim of EMOTIONAL ABUSE

Physical abuse can be seen but emotional abuses are much deeper and hidden from view

Physical vs emotional abuse

Signs of emotional abuse are not visible and rooted much deeper beneath the surface.

The abuser aims to frighten, isolate and finally gain complete control of the victim's mind. It can be your partner, spouse, parent, caretaker, or friend.

Signs of emotional abuse

Here are 10 signs that you are suffering from emotional abuse.

Physical or sexual abuse is much easier understood. But in emotional abuse, the abuser pretends to care and manipulates the victim in the name of caring. The abuser may even be kind and attentive to the victim for a period. This is defined as the grooming process of the abuser.

1. Always aim to please

You think 10 steps ahead to keep your abuser's happy.

You constantly second guess yourself and edit your questions and answers to suit what your abuser might want to hear from you. One wrong word from your mouth, and all hell breaks loose.

2. Constant gaslighting

The abuser dictates what the reality is.

This can go on to the point where you start questioning your sanity. Common ways of identifying this behavior are,

  • I never said anything like that
  • You know I never lie
  • You do not remember it correctly

3. Ridicule first, apologize later

The abuser may ridicule, shout or belittle you in front of others, but apologize later.

Once or twice such behavior can be forgiven. However, suppose the behavior continues regularly. In such circumstances, you must talk to the abuser and make sure they understand that such behavior is not appreciated.

4. Constantly know your location

The abuser wants to know where you are every second of every day.

Eventually, this progress is to the abuser expecting the victim to constantly text and mention where the victim is at every point of the day. Your abuser may also limit your interaction with other people and expect you not to talk to certain people.

5. Sarcasm as a joke

Constant sarcasm disguised as jokes

First, they will be sarcastic and say things that would leave a scar on your psyche. When you oppose, you will be told that it was a joke.

6. Constant apology

You apologize even when you do not understand what went wrong.

If you have grown used to hearing the word 'selfish, uncaring, do not care for others, everyone will leave you one day, you are nothing without my help, etc.' as a means to describe you, you are a victim of emotional abuse.

7. Hot and cold behavior

Sometimes caring, sometimes indifferent

When it suits the abuser, they will display a caring nature. However, if you do one single thing wrong, you will see the ice-cold side of the abuser.

8. Good things are never acknowledged

Good behavior is expected but bad behavior is admonished

When you do something good, it is attributed to the task being easy, or your achievement goes unacknowledged. Alternatively, your abuser may say, "I expected more from you." In other words, your efforts or accomplishments do not matter.

9. Left craving for everything

You have to beg for for money, affection, or any love from the abuser.

When affection, money, gifts are withheld, the relationship becomes toxic, and you should realize that you are being emotionally abused.

10. You deserve it.

Whatever bad happens to you, you deserve it as per the abuser.

Any problem you land up in, your abuser will tell you, "you deserve it." The exact words 'you deserve it' may not be used, but the sentence's meaning would be the same.

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