Leave a toxic relationship in 13 steps

Life is too short to stay in a toxic relationship

Toxic relationship

If you feel trapped in a relationship, depressed, listless, heartbroken, you are stuck in a toxic relationship.

Toxic relationships can cause irreparable damage to your psyche. The effects of a toxic relationship can be very crippling to the person's psyche as well as mental health.

But everything looks fine

The world may not see that something is broken inside.

The toxicity starts from the inside of the relationship. The toxicity may be emotional, psychological or physical. Either way it is harmful.

How to leave a toxic relationship?

Leaving a toxic relationship needs courage.

First, prepare yourself mentally and then take actionable steps to break free.

1. Seek help

You will need all the help you can get.

People stuck in toxic relationships often find it hard to get out. This happens because they start seeing themselves as broken glass. You may need help from a psychologist, friends and family. Do not hesitate to get what you need. Remember, your family is there for you all you have to do is ask.

2. If stuck in an abusive relationship

Leave immediately

There is no excuse for physically abusing you. If you are stuck in a toxic relationship involving abuse, leave immediately.

3. Rehabilitation

Rehabilitation takes time

Regaining the confidence that you are a free person and are free to make your own choices is hard when you are just getting out of a toxic relationship. You can take help from your friends and family and engage in activities you love to gain back the confidence.

4. Discuss your feelings

Talk to your partner if that is an option.

If your partner is and knowingly hurting you. You should discuss it with him or her. Keep the discussion on neutral ground and seek help from a counsellor if needed.

5. Go for couples counselling

If your partner agrees, get couples counselling

If your partner wants to mend his or her ways and ensure a better future for the both of you, you can opt for couples counselling. However, if your partner refuses to accept the mistakes and blames you, these are signs that the relationship cannot be mended and you must get out.

6. Decide what you want

This is something only you can do.

You must decide whether you want to stay in the relationship to fix it, give your partner a second chance or leave the relationship.

If your partner is indicating that he or she wants to be better, you can opt for counselling. If your partner is blaming you for things going wrong in the relationship, leave your partner.

7. Stick to your decision

It is easy to go back but that is not the solution

Once you leave, you may only remember the good parts. The bad part may not come to mind. Take a diary and write down all the bad part of the relationship and the reasons why you left your partner. When you feel like going back, look at the diary and remind yourself why you stayed away.

8. Work on self-esteem

Toxic relationships have a huge negative impact on self-esteem.

Toxic people manipulate others and destroy other’s confidence for their own gain. If you are healing from a toxic relationship, it is imperative that you work on your confidence levels. Go on a trip, go out with your friends and family, work on the things which make you feel happy, indulge in self-care et cetera. Get your confidence back.

9. Start saving money

The moment you decide to break free, start saving.

This is even more important if your partner has hurt you physically. If you have any proof of your partner threatening you, store it as evidence. You can use this evidence to get a restraining order.

10. Have a safety net

Save a little but save every time.

If you are a stay-at-home person, you need to have your own savings before you leave your partner. So start saving little by little every day.

11. Leave

It is time to leave your partner

If you have finally made the decision of leaving your partner and you see no other option of repairing the relationship, it is best to leave. If your partner is abusive, leave when he or she is not home and get a restraining order.

12. Cut off communications

It is very tempting to go back and talk to that person whom you loved for so long. But it is not always the solution

Refrain from calling, texting or communicating with your partner in anyway once you have left.

13. Give yourself time to heal

There is no set time limit for healing

You owe it to yourself to give yourself time to heal. This may take weeks months or even years. But you owe this to yourself. So don’t try to fast forward the process. The pain will come and go. Eventually it will start feeding in the background.

14. Work on yourself first

Learn to put yourself ahead of everything

Chances are that you got stuck in a toxic relationship because you put yourself in the backburner. This needs to change. Learn to love yourself and say no to others when needed.

Leave a toxic relationship for a better future

You deserve to be loved and you should not settle for anything less.

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Guilt Free Mind is a safe place where I help you explore your inner self and get rid of negative thoughts and emotions.

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