Emotional abuse cripples you in ways you cannot imagine. Knowing the signs can help you keep the mental damage to a minimum and get out as soon as possible.
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Physical abuse shows signs but emotional abuse does not.
This is possibly the worst part of emotional abuse. The signs are not seen. Everything looks okay on the front while on the inside, everything is breaking apart.
No matter who is abusing you, you do not deserve to suffer.
You deserve to love and be loved. You do not deserve the perils of emotional abuse.
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You always have to think 10 steps ahead.
You already know what would be the answer to your question if you dare to ask. You constantly second guess yourself and edit your questions and answers to suit what your abuser might want to hear from you
The abuser dictates what the reality is. This can go on to the point where you start questioning your sanity.
Some examples of gaslighting are:
The abuser may ridicule, shout or belittle you in front of others.
Examples of apology:
May seem to show genuine concern about your whereabouts, but it is a way to maintain control
This starts with calling up at random times to find out where you are. Eventually, this progress is to the abuser expecting the victim to constantly text and mention where the victim is at every point of the day.
First, they will be sarcastic and say things that would leave a scar on your psyche.
When you oppose, you will be told that it was a joke. You are humorless and should take life more lightly. However, the sarcastic remark has done its job.
Even when you do not understand what went wrong
If you have grown used to hearing the word 'selfish, uncaring, do not care for others, everyone will leave you one day, you are nothing without my help, etc.' as a means to describe you.
Sometimes they will care, sometimes they will ridicule
When it suits the abuser, they will display a caring nature. However, if you do one single thing wrong, you will see the ice-cold side of the abuser.
Your achievement goes unacknowledged.
Your efforts or accomplishments do not matter. You never receive a genuine compliment from the abuser.
When affection, money, gifts are withheld, the relationship becomes toxic, and you should realize that you are being emotionally abused.
The abuser may give you money but ask for expenditure details for every cent spent. You may not realize that withholding financial support or affection is abuse. But, when such behavior continues for the long term, it shatters the victim's self-confidence
Emotional abusers are experts at manipulating others.
There will be times when you regret the person the abuser has become. This phase comes when you realize that you are being the subject of emotional abuse. But do not try to change the abuser. You cannot.
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